Letting Go To Move On

More times than not you cannot move forward until you move on.....by LETTING GO!  Couple of things with actually 'letting go'.  First, you have to legitimately forgive yourself or others in order to let go of whatever.  True forgiveness doesn't mean you forget, but does mean you don't hold on to the emotion of whatever it is.  To hold on is only punishing you over and over again.  Whether it is yourself or someone else, you are torturing yourself for something from the past in the present again and again.  Is doing so solving or resolving anything?  NO!  Is harboring such negative emotion bettering your present or future?  NO!  Is holding on with such a firm grasp actively harming your emotional well being and physical health?  YES!  Let go and feel lighter emotionally and physically!!!  From a Christian standpoint, if Christ can forgive us, all of us, then who are we to think we are unforgiveable?  Once you ask Christ for forgiveness, it's done, over, don't ask Him again and don't punish yourself over and over again.  Move forward into the future!  Revel in the present!  And Don't REPEAT your mistakes, missteps, or whatever.....And if you fall, we're human, forgive, try harder, move forward!

You're Right....Life Isn't Fair

If you are having a tough time, get in line.  Struggles are a part of life, just as they are a part of your fitness or mental/emotional growth journey.  Learn from your hardships and/or your mistakes and move forward.  Anytime growing up I would lament that something wasn't fair, my Dad's retort was always "who ever said life was fair?"  Truer words were never spoken.  Life isn't fair!  Shit happens!  Get over it.....because you are only hurting yourself by holding on to what isn't fair in your life!!!!

Be Kind...Don't Judge...Be You!

You don't know what someone else is going through or where they have come from or where they are headed. Be kind!  Don't Judge! Be You and let everyone else be them and worry about themselves!  By the same token: Be Kind to yourself! Don't Judge yourself by others! Be you and do the best you can each moment!

"When we harbor negative emotions toward others or toward ourselves, or when we intentionally create pain for others, we poison our own physical and spiritual systems. By far the strongest poison to the human spirit is the inability to forgive oneself or another person. It disables a person's emotional resources. The challenge is to refine our capacity to love others as well as ourselves and to develop the power of forgiveness. " ~ Caroline Myss ~

What's Holding You Back?

"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not."  ~Unknown .... 

"Don't focus on what's holding you back, but what's already there."  ~Kathryn Budig

That is not to suggest you shouldn't also examine what your limitations are and why they are limitations; only that you shouldn't be debilitated by any such limitations.  Use your strengths to assist you with your weaknesses and at some point they will no longer be weaknesses.

"It's never too late to be who you might have been."  ~George Eliot

Stuck Between A Rock And A Hard Place

Sometimes life can be a tricky wicket and sometimes sticky to boot! Finding yourself between obstacles and seemingly impossible choices can be defeating....First, take a deep breath. Ask yourself if you are doing everything in your power and control to impact the situation. If the answer is "yes" then ask if there is more that you can do. If the answer is "no" then stay the course and have faith, that while you cannot change another or do more than you can do fully that as long as you do not give up or give in, it will work out. Bottom line is this...we can only change ourselves and our circumstances by continually examining ourselves: our thoughts, our actions, our contributions. When we fall into defeat or laziness is exactly when we accept the worst possible outcome. We are always responsible for ourselves and ourselves only! We are not responsible for the thoughts, actions, or consequences of others. Applying the "Golden Rule" here is to relinquish the false presumption of any control outside of ourselves and just be responsible for YOU! If you are thinking and acting in accordance with treating others in thought and action as you would have them treat you, then all is well even if the circumstances are less than desirable in the moment. 

Things 1, 2, and...

Those precious little beings we call our children can be quite a taxing handful at times for sure! Somehow when you're at your limit is when they can be at their worst. Why? Well, they pick up on our anxiety, fears, turmoil better than most adults and their response to this usually is to act out and mirror those very feelings we have. Talking with your kids when you're struggling helps not only mitigate their anxiety about what you are going through, but teaches them how to cope as they develop. Your children are not trying to break you. They appreciate all you do for them, but they are children and do not always know how to "deal" with what they are feeling. Snapping at them or arguing with them on their level is never going to get you or them in any kind of a better state. Each moment is a teaching moment for you to demonstrate to them the behavior they should have and the ways for which they should cope. Know that whatever behaviors you demonstrate will be the very ones they mirror and develop!

Vacant or Filled?

Do you know what fulfills you? Let's ask this: What do you do to fulfill yourself, balance yourself, center yourself? If your response doesn't include one or more of the following, then you are most likely vacating life/circumstances instead of participating: Intellect / Spirit / Body 

What do I mean by this? Well simply put, if you are doing pleasurable and albeit happy things like vegging out to television, internet, a good book, etc., then you are taking a mental vacation which is to say vacating your life. Vacations are great and important, but have their place and shouldn't ever be in place of intellectual, spiritual, or body fulfillment.

In order to actually center and be balanced (self fulfilled), you need to be engaged and working in the present on at least one or more of these areas, and ideally all three. Consider your brain, as an example, as you would the muscles in your body. Just like a muscle, your brain can atrophy from not being exercised. Same with your spirit...it will wither from not being fed. It's a vicious cycle between your thoughts and actions if you are not fulfilled and centered that will pull you further and further away from true happiness.

Find what makes your heart sing and your thoughts flood with excitement and your soul dance and DO that daily!!!